Considerate young man belies modern stereotype

Q: What’s with the young people of today? And some of the older ones as well? When driving, they are always in a hurry, can’t stop for anything, including pedestrians, stop signs, and stop lights. One can only assume that they carry such an attitude to other activities, as well. What ever happened to thinking of others and being considerate? I’m almost afraid to drive or walk anywhere.
A: There certainly are a great many obnoxious and dangerous people around us. As a pedestrian I have nearly been hit several times while crossing a street in a legal crosswalk, and I definitely have been driving in a much more defensive way to try to ensure my own safety. “Thoughtless” and “rude” are words that are extremely common in my mind, not to mention that old quote from the early 1940’s –“People are no damn good”.
There are exceptions, however, and not all young people are unpleasant and unthinking. Let me describe a totally unselfish and thoughtful young man with whom I was in contact a while ago.
My husband and I were having dinner at a very nice restaurant. Towards the end of the meal, he said that he was not feeling well and wished to leave. When he tried to arise from the table, however, he felt extremely light-headed. I quickly went over to the young maitre d’hotel (here-after known as Mr. G.) to get some help, but before Mr. G and I could reach him, my husband had fainted and collapsed.
Mr. G. immediately called the emergency telephone number, and the ambulance and fire department arrived very quickly. My near-and-dear had regained consciousness by that time, but it was decided that he should be taken immediately to the nearest hospital, which, unfortunately, was about thirty miles away. I was unable to leave with him because I needed to pick up some things in our hotel room that I had not taken to dinner.
I was reluctant to drive so far by myself. It was dark and I didn’t have any idea how to find the hospital. There were no taxis nearby so I considered calling one from the city where the hospital was located. At that point, Mr. G said that he would be happy to drive me. He was very persuasive, saying that her could leave others in charge and we could start off when I was ready. It was only later that I realized that he could have been in trouble if a problem had developed in the restaurant.
We drove nearly an hour to reach the hospital, Mr. G came in with me and waited while I visited my husband and was so relieved to discover that nothing serious was wrong. The physicians were not ready to release him, however, and I didn’t want to take up more of Mr. G’s time, so I decided to return to the hotel.
We had a nice chat, and we exchanged information about our lives. When we returned, I insisted that I must pay him, but he absolutely refused, making it clear that he would be insulted if I made a further issue of it. We have seen Mr. G again a few times and have been quite friendly. He knows about the Mind Works program, and graciously accepted a copy of my book “Don’t Lose Your Mind”.
Here I have described an example of an outstanding, caring, thoughtful, and totally unselfish young person. I will always be indebted to him.

Losing things? Try these steps

Q: I regularly lose things such as my sunglasses, keys, and even my wallet now and again. They eventually turn up, usually where I least expect them, but it’s very stressful in the meantime. Any ideas on how to make the inevitable searching process more productive?

A: How many times have I heard this question? You share this problem with SO many other people and yet there really are a number of things that you can do to help solve it. Let’s start with the keys.
Keys are so necessary, and probably the most constantly used item of all those that you mentioned. Select a particular spot that is convenient to your house doors, or wherever you enter your home. It should be a spot where you will always be using your keys. Install a nail, hook, or perhaps even a small basket—something that can hold your keys. Then ALWAYS put your keys there. I have a magnetic hook attached to the refrigerator, just inside the kitchen door that is very convenient to my entry way. My keys ALWAYS go there immediately when I arrive home. On a rare occasion, I have not remembered where I put my keys, but when I checked the hook—guess what?—there they were! Find a place for yourself today.
Some items, such as glasses, are with us even more of the time than are keys, especially if we need them for reading or other detailed work. Those attachments that are made to fit the earpieces of glasses can be a great help in keeping the glasses around your throat when you aren’t using them. These can help one avoid misplacing them, inasmuch as they will always be with you.
Sunglasses are usually worn far less often, and my first suggestion for avoiding losing them is the same as for keys: always put them in the same place. However, if they are lost, there is another technique that often works well for finding them, or any other misplaced item.
Use your imagination. I do not mean this in the usual sense, but imagining is involved. Take a comfortable seat. Try to imagine what you were doing when you last wore your sunglasses. Where were you, exactly? Try to remember the situation. Where had you been? What activities were you doing? Why did you wear sunglasses? Ask all the pertinent questions and answer them as well as you can. If possible, actually retrace your steps. Relive the situation. You may well be surprised at how clearly the details develop. Others who have tried this technique have told me how well it really works.
In general, it would be very helpful for you to become more focused, to concentrate, and to pay close attention to details around you. Being aware of your surroundings and of your activities can help you to remember what you have done, and where you were while you were doing it. Avoid distractions as well as you can. Late in the day, try to remember your activities in as much detail as possible.
All these ideas are time consuming but can help you to be organized and in control of your life and possessions. Give it a try.